Dads story Leon and baby Verity (home birth – March 2015)

• Suddenly Hay seemed different, in the zone and in control. Controlling breathing and dealing with the early contractions
• Hay gave me the added confidence that we were going to be having this baby at home, and I remember feeling very relaxed about the whole situation
• We slept or laid in bed for an hour or so, around 1am it seemed like things were now starting to get going. I was trying to time contraction lengths and gaps without annoying Hay and whilst trying to sort the pool and various other things out. I kept losing track but eventually I asked Hay if I should tell Rene to come and she said yes. This was round 2am ish I think when I text Rene and said she should start coming over.
• Contractions now seemed stronger and very frequent and Hay couldn’t focus on anything else, she was on her knees and breathing through the contractions
• Before Rene arrived Hay started to get louder I guess as the pain increased
• I was happy to see the headlights on the drive when Rene turned up, for added comfort / back up for both of us. To ensure all was ok and that we weren’t going anywhere near a hospital!
• Rene snuck in quietly. I had put the dogs out of the way and it seemed perfectly normal for her to be there.
• Hay was bent over the sofa now squeezing my hand and pushing her forehead on it, still doing amazing. We’d set the tens machine up on her back and that seemed to help
• Hay got very loud now so Rene started to gently get her to relax and take the tension out of her body, the words ‘so soft’ were repeated a few times…
• I remember Hay saying to me at one point ‘she’s being born’ as she could feel verity moving down. Obviously totally different from her last birth where the epidural had taken any feeling away
• I couple of times Hay said ‘I can’t do this’ but we didn’t just say she could we really knew she could do it and this just meant she was at the transition and got there pretty quickly and with just the tens machine and my hand to squeeze.
• Hay had numerous tiny sips of water between contractions but was just so focussed it was inspiring to watch and be a part of
• I remember Rene phoning Sally and saying she’s at transition and will be pushing soon, I wasn’t sure she was being totally truthful as Hay had seemed to have got there so quick. I thought it was a bit of psychology, but it seemed it wasn’t. Sally arrived within about 60mins and Hay was ready to push so must have been 4am ish
• Pushing was hard work and was drawing on Hays last energy reserves, but as she’d pushed for 7hrs with Rose I had no doubt she would do this it was just how long it would take
• The pool had been mentioned for a minute but was quickly out of the question, other than a couple of quick trips to the loo Hay had spent the whole labour kneeled in front of the grey sofa
• Hay wanted me to push hard on her lower back to ease her back pain and I guessed help to open up her pelvis.
• Rene and Sally kept looking at each other and giving nods of approval which Hay wouldn’t have seen
• I remember Rene saying she could see the head but it seemed a good while before V eventually came out, probably only half an hour in reality though
• I felt very close to Hay, especially during the pushing and was so happy to be there, to have her, to be of some small support to her and that she was doing this at home on her own
• Within a blink V had come out and was passed between Hays legs. She had a look of complete disbelieve that that was it, V had arrived, the labour was over and she had done it.
• I had tears in my eyes as I was and am so proud of her and have tears in my eyes as I’m typing this
• Hay is amazing and I will never forget that night from the point of view of what she did but also how close we are and how much better things are when we work together